She rolled to the other side of the bed and heaved a sigh of distress. Pulled the sheets up to her chin and stared at the floor and absorbed the silence of loneliness and time which she was engulfed in. She wished she was somewhere far from home. But where? This question nagged at her every passing moment as she wasted her precious last year of teens wondering and hoping a miracle would get her out of her parents house and drop her somewhere better. She grunted in frustration and utter hopelessness and rolled back to the previously occupied side of the bed, all curled up like a vulnerable child left in isolation. She lied there bathed in the morning winter sun light coming from the windows with curtains wide open. Her curly chestnut short brown hair hid her honey colored melancholy eyes from where I could see her. I knew she had fallen asleep with tears in her eyes last night, for her mascara was smeared across both her cheeks. I could tell by the seriousness and the grief stricken expression on her face that she did not want to be disturbed. Who had muddled with the peace of her mind? I had no answers but my heart ached to look for them and crack her secrets, mysteries and every intricate and minute pieces of detail of her past. I yearned to know her inside out, to understand her scars and her fears and finally become her comfort. I wanted those big teary eyes to look into mine and get lost as if she’s drowning and I’m the shore, the sanctuary. My soul cried for her acceptance and I swear upon this universe there was nothing as true or real as she was. I wanted to become her world so she could swear upon me and tell me that I am her universe, just like how I am swearing right now. She was so human and I was struck by her reality so painfully strong that there were moments where I believed I was either dreaming or dead. I saw times where I started to doubt my own sanity and existence.
I gave her silence the leverage to break me, but then again I also gave her forceful smile the edge to melt me and put me back together as if nothing had happened in the first place. What makes a person fall for something that might not exist, I do not understand and I don’t think I ever will. She had fallen asleep now and by the time her heavy breathing broke the unprecedented silence, my cigarette had also stopped crackling. I got up from the recliner, stood by the edge of the bed where she lay, bent down and gently brushed her tresses back to kiss her for the last time. For the only time. I left in the hope that she’d forget about whatever was toying with her thoughts and that she’d never need me again for she was poison to my heart and I was merely a boy who secretly wanted to befriend her devils.
Ninja Dragon Wolf 